Self Care During Separation and Divorce


The search for divorce attorneys has been made simpler. The lawyers’ details are displayed on law firms’ websites for access by potential clients. Understand the qualifications of the choice of lawyer you wish to work with.

As a customer, there is a need to have a background before hiring a lawyer. By doing this, you can rate the kind of services to expect from the legal services and advice provided by the lawyer. A professional in the legal system will guide you on the best divorce tips for wife

Divorce attorneys manage your divorce details right from the divorce number after filing a divorce case in court. When filing for a divorce what to know will be made clear by the divorce lawyers.

Ask around from close friends and relatives for the best divorce attorneys near you. People will vouch for outstanding legal services received. After getting referrals ensure you check the reviews and feedback given by clients who have worked with the lawyer you hire.

Make inquiries on the number of cases of your type that the professional has handled. In the number of similar issues to the one, you wish the lawyer to handle, check how many cases the lawyer has won.

The last thing anyone needs right now is more stress. If you are going through a divorce, it may seem inevitable for stress to continue piling up, but that’s not necessarily true. With the right steps, an amicable, relatively low-stress divorce is possible.

In Burlington, Vermont, mediators and attorneys are coming together to host webinars counseling would-be divorcees on the secrets to an amicable divorce. The webinars recommend planning a collaborative divorce or working closely with mediators. In just about all cases, that means coming to final decisions without exhaustive litigation and, most importantly, keeping it out of court.

Whether you are currently in the throes of amicable or a not-so-amicable divorce, it is an important time to focus on you and what’s best for your sanity. Even in the most ideal circumstances, some stress, hurt, and emotional adjustment are inevitable. Use these quick pointers to prioritize self care during separation and divorce.

Find a New Place To Live

What does self care during separation and divorce look like? While the answer to that question can easily vary from person to person, there are some universal truths — or some things that help no matter what. One of these things is finding a new home.

While moving takes a great deal of effort, it is definitely for the best as you go through separation and/or divorce. First, some states will not allow you to finalize the process without living apart from your ex-partner for an allotted amount of time. That exact time frame depends on your state. Second, your current home is likely packed with memories from your marriage, both good and bad. Remaining in your home can easily bring these memories up, and leave you feeling stuck.

Remember that finding a new home doesn’t have to be a burden or an inconvenience. Take steps to make it the best possible experience for you. Only you know what that means. If you always dreamed of building your own home, now is the time to do it. Contact new home builders about making your dream a reality. If you always wanted to live in a different city, to move to the suburbs, or to live in a more walkable part of town, take the opportunity to do it.

Give Your New Home a Makeover

Did you know that your surroundings can have a very real and tangible impact on your mental health? A less-than-ideal environment packs the potential to:

  • Increase anxiety. If your environment is untidy and filled with clutter, that can significantly increase anxiety. Our brains are only meant to focus on so many things at a time. Clutter disrupts that focus and makes us feel ill at ease.
  • Worsen mood. A lack of natural sunlight, ill-lit rooms, and dark, dreary days can leave the best of us feeling sluggish and unmotivated.
  • Deepen depression. If you suffer from depression, your symptoms are more likely to flare up in environments that make you uncomfortable. If your immediate surroundings remind you of difficult memories, they have the potential to aggravate your symptoms and make them harder to manage.

That means, when it comes to self care during separation and divorce, paying attention to our environment is an instrumental part of the process. Surprisingly, when you are going through a divorce, it is one of the best times to give your home a makeover and be extra particular about its appearance

Consider doing something practical, doing something eye-catching, and doing something that fulfills a desire or wish that you have. For example, even the nicest homes may require some fixing up when you move in. Is your home lacking proper insulation? Does it need new gutters? Address these practical problems to make yourself more comfortable and to make yourself truly feel at home. Insulation is important for proper heating and cooling, and gutters are important for diverting water away from your home, so it does not end up pooling on top of your roof and leaking through the ceiling.

Next, invest in something (or some things!) that look nice. If you always wanted new counters, talk to a team of professionals about the installation and perks of engineered granite countertops. Granite looks great, lasts, wards off bacteria and germs, and promises a plentiful return on investment (ROI).

Conclude your home makeover with something that is just for you. Install a new hot tub, convert the attic into an at-home yoga studio, add a walk-in closet, build a reading nook, or turn the garage into a complete, at-home bar.

Take Pride In Your New Home

Again, the state of your home directly affects your personal well-being and mental health. Give yourself a leg up by doing whatever you can to keep your home looking nice. Here are some ideas:

  • Keep the lawn tidy. One of the first things people see when they visit your home is its exterior, including your lawn. Keep up appearances by regularly mowing the lawn or hiring someone to mow it for you. Invest in lawn treatment, and plant colorful flowers and greenery to give it that extra something. Prune bushes, and invest in a tree trimming service to keep your trees healthy, to keep tree branches from scratching your house, to keep tree limbs from falling onto your house, and to keep your yard looking its best.
  • Give the exterior of your home a little TLC. Just like the lawn, the exterior of your home is going to stand out, giving it a well-kept and attractive appearance or… not. Make sure it’s the former by washing the outside of your home with a mild soap or detergent and a hose with a special attachment. Spruce up the exterior’s appearance even more by applying a fresh coat of paint. Complete the process by getting up on a ladder and cleaning out the gutters to ensure that your roof doesn’t leak and still water does not pool around your home.
  • Prioritize the features that keep you comfortable. Pay close attention to the features that keep you comfortable, like your heating, ventilation, and air conditioning (HVAC) system and plumbing. Regularly change your air filter, and bring in a contractor to inspect your HVAC unit twice per year. To keep your plumbing working properly, The New York Times suggests you “give your pipes a good once-over, checking under sinks to make sure there are no signs of leaks” and examine “faucets for drips and the flapper in the tank of your toilet to make sure it has not worn out.”

An important part of self care during separation and divorce is routine and taking pride in your new home. Establish a new routine around maintaining your home, and feel more confident about yourself and your surroundings by keeping your house in tip-top shape.

Take Care Of Your Body

One of the best ways to combat stress during this time is to take care of your body. Start by getting plenty of exercise.

Exercise releases endorphins and serotonin, demonstrably improving your mood. It also helps you build self-confidence, make new friends (join a virtual class or group class), and even lessens the pain you feel. According to the Harvard Medical School, regularly practicing yoga can alleviate symptoms of chronic back pain, arthritis, migraines, and fibromyalgia, and most exercise will help relieve certain types of pain, like chronic back pain.

If you continue to feel debilitating pain even after establishing a regular exercise routine, visit your local chiropractic clinic for lasting pain relief.

Self care during separation and divorce is of utmost importance. Take care of your body first so that you are physically healthy enough to tend to your mental health as well.

Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle

No matter what, divorcing your spouse takes quite the emotional toll. Prioritize self care during separation and divorce to remain as emotionally healthy as possible.

Remember, maintaining a healthy lifestyle isn’t just about getting regular exercise. Regular exercise is a great start. Complement your fitness routine by eating well and getting plenty of sleep.

Harvard Medical School reveals that 95% of the neurotransmitter serotonin originates in your gut or gastrointestinal tract. In order to stimulate its production, it is important to eat healthy and nutritious meals. Eat a diet rich in vitamins and minerals to promote good moods. Experts recommend building a colorful plate to ensure that you are getting the vitamins and minerals you need. There are different key nutrients present in leafy greens, orange fruits and vegetables, purple fruits and vegetables, etc.

Plus, do not underestimate the importance of quality sleep. Sleep is important to self care during separation and divorce because sleep is restorative. Quality sleep results in better memory, more learning, greater creativity, and happier moods. A lack of sleep is closely linked to depression, distress, and mental health problems.

Find a New Hobby

When you are going through a divorce, it is the perfect time to find a new hobby. Why?

Finding a new hobby can help you work up motivation, establish goals, and create meaning. It is important to do all of these things on top of meeting with divorce lawyers, which can get emotionally draining on its own.

According to The Conversation, science concludes that people are markedly less likely to be depressed after picking up a new hobby. Taking part in an activity or devoting yourself to a hobby helps you avoid some of the pitfalls of depression, like staying in bed all day, neglecting hygiene, and eating too much or too little.

Even better, when it comes to hobbies and self care during separation and divorce, the most important thing is to try a new hobby and to find one that sticks. Exactly what hobby you choose is up to you. You may benefit from yoga, fishing, gardening, learning to play a musical instrument, writing, or art. Try out these hobbies — and more — until you find one that you genuinely look forward to and naturally becomes part of your routine.

Reach Out to Friends and Family For Support

Even a somewhat amicable divorce settled through divorce mediation is a stressful life event. When it comes to reaching out for support, there is a right way to do it and a wrong way to do it. Prioritize self care during separation and divorce by making the best possible choices. In other words, carefully consider who will lend a genuinely kind ear when you need it most.

Most importantly, if you have kids, keep them out of it. Speaking ill of your ex-spouse or soon-to-be ex-spouse can alienate them. Your children may grow to resent you for saying bad things about a parent they continue to love, or they may take your words to heart and separate themselves from a parent that they need.

Avoid talking to relatives and friends who are especially opinionated and may make you feel worse, and proceed with caution before approaching mutual friends. Assuming they are still trying to retain a relationship with you and your ex, bringing up the divorce may feel like you are putting them in the middle of things.

Instead, reach out to relatives who will be there to listen or offer a hug. Vent to friends who are not invested in their relationship with your ex-spouse.

Celebrate Milestones With Loved Ones

Finally, don’t go it alone! If you are accustomed to celebrating milestones with your spouse or your spouse and children, you may have to carefully think about expanding your support network. Think about family and friends you always wanted to spend more time with in the past, and do it. Keep it light-hearted. Celebrate your birthday with fun, custom birthday T-shirts, or invite your friends over for a festive Friendsgiving. Self care during separation and divorce isn’t always literal. Sometimes, the best thing you can do for yourself is to surround yourself with kind, loving people. That is especially important during milestones.

Divorce — under any circumstances and for any reason — takes its toll. Keep your spirits up and your head on your shoulders by making a point to take care of yourself now and for the foreseeable future.

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